Things all job seekers should know

[Jonrod]

When applying for jobs, make sure you don't make these fatal resume mistakes. I read this and got a laugh out of it. Because it's true. One of my jobs is to read resume's and I see this stuff all the time.

7 worst resume blunders | CFOsnafu.com | Some days it should be legal to keep two sets of books

Especially the ridiculous email addresses of potential candidates.

I hope this helps some people, judging by the way some of you all sound here (not naming anyone)

[Danester]

ever tried emailing a court justice with questions about a ticket or fine with the email of "fkupig@aol.com"? lol I've never made an email address I've been embarrased to hand out......but I'm sure its happened......nice laugh tho jon.....I've seen a bigger list than that....if I find it I'll link it in here..

[Danester]

150 Funniest Resume Mistakes, Bloopers and Blunders Ever | JobMob

[Jonrod]

yeah, that was just something I ran into on yahoo. But it is good information nonetheless.

[Jonrod]

I've also seen people come to interviews for serious jobs, dressed like they were about to go to the skate park. Some people are dumb. Also people with weak ass hand shakes piss me off.

[DarkSidEclipse]

Strong Hand Shake is key

[Asian Cracker]

Lolz

[Mattman]

i found this one pretty funny. it was under the top ways to quite your job.

I’ve got something to say — A teenage Target employee in Nashville, TN, was reprimanded for repeatedly coming into work late. She decided to quit, and on her way out, she dialed into the store’s P.A. system and let loose with a five-minute tirade that isn’t suitable for publication. By the time employees figured out which phone she was talking from, the damage had already been done.

[Slippercream]

Not exactly funny material, but I do notice a lot of folks prep their resumes or attend job interviews like they go about prom or nominations for homecoming. Sure, you're supposed to make yourself look good, but not to the point of being audaciously idiotic. In fact, in an effort to stand out, most people end up looking like drones. Sitting in waiting rooms with interviewers, I'm still surprised to find people dressed as if they're going to prom Or at least the college folk.... silk pastel shirts, jewelry, sharp contrast tie, cologne.

IMO, best resumes are those that have less verbage and focus on achievement and responsibility than time-task lists. If you've little or no experience, you definitely have to focus on attributes than time. If you're a consultant with extensive project experience, I've found that the best kind of resume isn't a 7-page one which details each and every task performed at every job--- that's less believable than, say, someone who talks in "mission critical" and "executive" terms --- the big picture, so to speak, which is always easier to spot with brevity.

As for clothing and decorum, I personally have two favorite "business costumes".

The Accountant always has a crisply pressed white cotton dress shirt and plain blue or red tie under a conservative plain black or grey suit. No pinstripes necessary, or if ever, very subtle. Belt is worn no lower than an inch from the belly button and a tie clip is a nice add. Shiny shoes not optional. This garb suits a lot of finance and management-level jobs, connoting simplicity and direct-to-the-point a WYSIWYG kind of confidence.

The Big Blue attire suits more "people" jobs - sales and marketing, IT and business analysis, PR, HR, etc. Lightly colored cotton dress shirt and lightly contrasting tie (i.e. baby blue/yellow, yellow/red; light green/black or grey). Slim fit suit and pants with more fashionable pinstripes allowed and in fact looks sharper to folks who like trendsetting new hires. I wouldn't mind a low-fitting set of dress pants for this. Still, nothing too flashy nor shiny.

One portfolio pad folder with a fresh, new pad looks better than a whole laptop bag. Only insert(s) should be (a) copy(ies) of your resume. Oh... and I wouldn't hand out business cards.

Finally, biggest faux pas folks have these days is giving out their "personal" online info - like "slippercream@yahoo" or putting social networking sites on any identifiable job profile or resume. Though employers' HR departments do search those these days, I'd still play it safe and try to keep work separate from fun while you're still on the search.


Wow... just realized this reads like an article...

[Jonrod]

its true though. I have several different suits I have used for interviews. My job right now is shirt and tie monday thru thursday, and business casual on fridays. I'm always full suit when attending special events and/or on official company travel.

Golden rule for resume's is no more than one page. And like slipper said, focus on achievements and position responsibilities.

[DarkSidEclipse]

First Impressions deffinatly make an impression. I don't look at resume's but as a SSG in the Army and always getting new Soldiers in I can usualy tell right off the bat after a few mins weather or not the Private is gonna be a Fucked-up Soup Sandwich S#!tbag or a Good Squared away Soilder

[Mattman]

^isnt that the truth

one page resume is a must. however dress code is a touchy subject. I mean no matter what you should be absolutely the best dressed most professional looking person there. I always ensure this. but i dont go with the classic styles i go with the modern looks. nice fitted suit skinny tie, you know the look. classy and eye catching.

[Jonrod]

Yup. squared away, neatly pressed, fresh haircut, clean shaven or neatly trimmed. No gum! Not alot of people know that or even think about it for that matter.

[DarkSidEclipse]

Respectful and no Slang

[Danester]

I walked into an interview once "as is" after work......I had a uniform from the company I was working for, it was dirty....I had worked in it all day....the shirt was unbuttoned, my hat was on backwards and I hadn't shaved in days.....oddly enough, when I replaced the manager that hired me, 4 years later (he quit), he told me when he first saw me, he was like wtf?.....I'm a firm believer in WYSIWYG.......fortunately, that isn't always true....but then again, I'm a bit of a nonconformist.....I recently applied for a position for the Church, in the online interview it asks what your career objectives are.....I'm a Plumber....I was speechless, and my wife had no clue what to put there.....so I typed in "I'd like to retire with all of my fingers intact." Plain simple truth......

[Slippercream]

^^^ That's cool!

Funny thing with trade professions is you really can't fake experience, especially once you get behind equipment and tools! I mean, I can handle myself behind a lathe and hand tools, but put me behind a CNC mill and I'm clueless! Having lived in Beaumont/Port Arthur and Houston, TX - both industrial oil/chemical "cities" I do know that interviewing in work attire definitely makes a statement - "I am working and can do the job" - especially when and where people care more about experience than the way a person looks.

Perhaps my take on interviewing is skewed. It gets ugly in the "office space" world, where the unspoken, common knowledge truth about office "rep" is that it's all about perceptions and expectations. These days even the newest newbie can get by just by looking good, acting the part, and not flinching when the going gets tough. Some of the slowest workers I've known have skated by just fine just because they can duck it out with the big boys in conference calls. But when the bosses aren't looking, it's a different story.

Oh... and about resumes, truth is the one-page thing isn't exactly a cardinal rule anymore. At least not unless you've got the experience and certifications to really a second or third page up. Then the first page becomes a page for the "general stuff... At least mine's the "bullet-pointer / 'Ok, here's the skinny' " that does away with the need for a cover letter.

[liquidsilver]

I remember an interview went on. It was my third with the HR people of a large corp and on the way to the woman's office I passed a few admin. persons but when I went pass one a envelope flew off the desk an onto the floor. Sure that happens all the time. So I stopped and picked it up and handed it to the person. They were so thank you meaning the admin person and the HR person. I knew that was part of the interview.

[liquidsilver]

Another time years later I went for a "stupid Job" interview and I pass the electrical test so they wanted to give me a psych test. One question was "There are two types of drug users.
1 recreational users
2 Use all the time
Which one are you? check the box
So I crossed out both boxes and wrote on top of them sorry I don't match any of your choises because I don't do drugs
They ask me to come back and talk to their managment for another interview

[Jonrod]

the PD I used to be at psych tested just like that. So many failed lol

[Mattman]

^ AT&T test like that as well lol

[psy-q]

Anything see anything wrong with psy-q@hotmail.com?

[Jonrod]

its alright. Its not ostentateous or blatantly fucktarded.

[liquidsilver]

Hahaha

[inspiredbydesign]

I've always heard and practiced a 1 Page Limit to my resumes. Anyways my b/f mom was making a resume and she made it 5 pages!!!! I was like wow, who would want to read that. I couldn't get through the first page hardly.

So none the less I help my b/f with his resume, and so far it has a 100% success rate.

They say each resume only get like 15sec. the first, so a 1 page first impression is the way to do it. If its to long they won't even bother most the time.